By PTI
NEW DELHI: Actor Samir Soni lays bare selections from his diary in his debut book, which he says is an attempt to let people know that “you’re not alone”, especially in these pandemic times. Starting his career with a stable job as a financial analyst in a top investment bank, Soni decided to go for a career in acting that saw frequent ups and downs.
He says the phase after his not-so-successful film debut and abrupt divorce in the late 1990s was the most trying phase of his life.
“Nothing had prepared me for this double whammy. I had never hurt like this before and, worse still, I wasn’t even sure why. I had experienced heartbreaks and failures before but it was never this bad. Determined not to ever feel like this again, I decided to confront my pain and not run away from it. Thus started my experiments with silence,” he says.
“The idea was to learn to be by myself, my pain, my fears, my disappointments and not to reach out for any distractions – phone, friends, TV or a book. The only luxury I allowed myself was writing,” Soni, who has been married to actor and jewellery designer Neelam Kothari since 2011, adds.
The book documents “my thoughts and emotions and revelations during this soul-searching experience which lasted almost two years, and is largely responsible for the man I’m today”. A diary is considered a very personal belonging for many people, especially for introverts.
So why did Soni decide to share such a vulnerable part of himself with the world? “The diary was written with no intention of sharing it with anybody, it was just a habit that I had of keeping a journal. So after writing, I kept it away, at that time I was approached by some publishing houses but I wasn’t too keen on it because I wrote for myself, it was therapeutic and cathartic for me, and that was it,” he says.
“Fast forward to 10-15 years later, I was approached by Preeti Chaturvedi, CEO of The Sunflower Seeds brand consulting and she asked me if I was interested in writing something so I just shared with her what I had written earlier,” Soni says.
This time he was a little more open because COVID had happened and a lot of people were suffering. “I also lost a very dear friend, and I could see that the things that they are struggling with or the emotions were not very different from what I had been through there. I felt that the time was right to share and let the people know that you’re not alone,” he says.
“It’s a tough world if you are an introvert, because we live in an extroverted world. So, accept yourself for who you are, wear it as a badge of honour if you want. Don’t try to conform to what you’re not. You will fail. Be true to yourself and surround yourself with like-minded people, so there are no needs for the alter egos to exist,” he writes in the book, published by OM Books International.
Soni has appeared in films like “China Gate”, which was his debut, “Baghban”, “Basti” and “Vivah” and also played the lead role in Ekta Kapoor’s soap opera “Parichay – Nayee Zindagi Kay Sapno Ka”.
